Wednesday, July 8, 2009

It Was a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day


The blog title & the above photo say it all - yesterday was rough. I even considered moving to Australia, just like the children's book, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. Bullet points may be helpful...it was intense (at least from the mom's perspective). {grin}

  • All four boys started sneezing, running fevers, and spewing snot in mass quantities late Tuesday afternoon. The babies are whining like mad and the big boys are grouchy.
  • Sam had mild "night terrors" Wednesday night...calling out, rolling around in his bed - but, still sound asleep. He woke Luke up more than once. Neither of them got good sleep (their mom didn't either).
  • After lunch, Sam & Luke were playing in the living room. Luke pushed Sam and it hurt his feelings. He was laying on the couch trying to explain to Luke that he didn't like to be pushed...when, Matthew bonked him on the head with a plastic mug he had stolen from the kitchen table. A large, purple, painful looking goose-egg appeared on Sam's forehead. He was obviously in pain, tired, and frustrated. The tears flowed. I scooped him up and sympathized with him...and then a crying Caleb began to crawl up on Sam. Caleb got frustrated that his climb wasn't easy - and he pinched Sam. Sam howled. He was just frustrated beyond words. Caleb and Sam were crying...Luke & Matthew were watching in horror. {grin}
  • I told Sam how sorry I was and that Caleb didn't intend to hurt him. It was as if a flood of emotion broke in his heart...he began to cry, saying, "I just want you to hold me. Pay attention to me, not a baby." His words pierced my heart...and I fought to hold back my own tears. Sam clung to my neck so tightly as his heart broke. ugh. It was bad. I quickly prayed and then began to tell Sam all of the reasons I love him. I told him that his Daddy & I do lot's of things to show him how special he is: special "dates" with only him, breakfast with daddy each morning before anyone else is up (they are both early risers), our special "school time" when the 3 little ones are napping, reading books and praying together each night, etc...
  • Caleb continued to cry while I was comforting Sam. Sometimes I just wish I had more arms for holding little ones or could clone myself for just a bit (I mean seriously, two of me would be a bit much) {grin}.
  • All of this happened as I was trying to get the twins ready to leave for an appointment with our pediatrician (18 month old well visit). It was chaos and I was overwhelmed.
  • Poor Brad came home from work to stay with the big boys (he is such a good man) and found us all in a mess! I finally peeled Sam off of my body and managed to get the little men loaded into the van. I began to cry as I pulled out of our driveway. Nasty thoughts like, "You will never be able to meet their needs. There isn't enough of you to go around. Why did you have all of these children if you can't care for them?" began to fill my mind. I sobbed...and then, I prayed. As I prayed, I was reminded that Satan is a liar - and he was whispering lies in my ear about my mothering. Each boy has been a gift from God to us..and I am the God-chosen mother to each of them. I called my friend, Granola Mom, and left an unintelligible message on her answering machine. I babbled something about praying for me and being under spiritual attack. What a great message to receive! {grin} I chatted with my dear friend, Deb, and she reminded me of God's truth about who I am and how He loves me. Deb had the wisdom to tell me that Sam was just expressing the cry of everyone's heart - notice me, pay attention to me, love on me. God soothed my heart and I managed to pull myself together before I arrived at the pediatrician's office.
  • While waiting for the doctor to arrive in the exam room, the nurse was asking a few questions about Caleb & Matthew. As I answered, I undressed Caleb and then let him toddle around the room. He walked across the small room to look out the window. He bent down to look at something on the floor, and hit his eye on the edge of the window sill. He burst into tears and I scooped him up. The nurse noticed he was bleeding. She went to get the doctor...and 20 minutes later, our doctor arrived. We've always been pleased with the care we've received - but, I thought this was a bit long to wait under the circumstances.
  • After cleaning the wound, she determined that stitches weren't necessary. She applied 6 steri-strips (looks like small pieces of tape to hold the wound closed). The cut is deep but very small.
  • Sweet little Matthew sat silently in the stroller while the doctor and I tended to Caleb. Not a peep out of him the entire time. I kept looking at him and giving him a reassuring smile. He just grinned in return and waved to me. {melt my heart}
  • Matthew was examined and she found he had a double ear infection. So, no immunizations for them since they were both feverish and feeling badly.
  • Aside from the eye gash and ear infection, both boys are healthy and growing along just fine.
  • We came home to find that Sam was much happier after a two hour nap (he gave up napping nearly 18 months ago).
I am often asked, "How do you do it?" I hear people say, " I don't know how you do it. I could not do what you do." The truth of the matter is...we can't do it. I am not gonna lie, there are times when I think I am going to lose it (my mind, that is). Raising our four little men ages five and under is a challenge at times. I am learning that we simply can't do it alone. This may not be such revelatory news to most, but I need to be reminded from time to time. I am a get'r done kind of gal...just buck up and do it. But, we can't do it alone by God's design...we aren't intended to live alone, do it alone, or be without a community. God has designed us to be in relationship with Him, rely on Him, use His strength rather than our own, and to trust Him to do what He says He will do. It was a rough day, but God is still so good.


"The Lord is my strength and my shield;
my heart trusts in Him, and I am helped."
Psalm 28:7

2 comments:

Unknown said...

WOW! So glad that we actually got to talk on the phone this day. i love you!

Michelle said...

Poor little guy! Now he and Taylor have matching eye owies. :) Hers is a nice scar now :( Hopefully his won't leave a scar.

And, for what it is worth, I think you are one of the calmest, most loving, devoted mommies in the world. He is very evident in your home and family. Those four little men are very lucky to have you and Brad as parents. We can't wait to hang with you all again, soon!