Random Thoughts

I just finished cleaning the kitchen...it's late and I'm tired, but the music on my Ipod helped me to find some "joy" in my job tonight. While I was cleaning, my mind was full of very random thoughts. Among the thoughts was, "I should write this stuff down. Some day I'll look back on this season of my life, and I will have forgotten how sweet it was and how God was working in my life."
So, here it is:

• Sam (5) has a very good friend just two doors down from our house. They play together several times a week - at our house or his. Joshua and Sam ride bikes in our cul de sac nearly every night after dinner. They do their best to avoid hitting Luke - who has no appreciation for the "rules of the road." {grin} Joshua and Sam have so much in common: they are both 5 (S was born just 3 days before J), they are both gentle and tender-hearted boys, they are both easily intimidated by aggressive children, they both enjoy super heroes and Star Wars (although neither of them has seen the movie). When Sam returned from a play date at Joshua's a few weeks ago, I asked what they had played. Sam said, "We played Joseph." I wracked my brain trying to think of what this meant - a new Star Wars guy? I pressed Sam for more information and he replied with, "Mom, like Jesus being born...his mom and dad." These boys are so blessed to have one another - and we are so blessed to have friends like the Chen family to walk alongside as we each work to honor God in raising our sons to be men of God.
• I never thought that getting older would be a blessing, but it is. I am really growing in confidence in the Lord and who I am in Him. For example, I am more willing to just simply obey - even when I don't understand. It isn't always easy...but, I am learning to do it without questioning. Mind you, it's in small ways...but, I am learning. For example, I was shopping for groceries very late one night last week...and I dreaded it. It seems that the store is full of grumpy parents and very tired children who should be in bed...instead, they are crying and getting reprimanded by their parents. It makes me crazy! So, I prayed on my way to the store that I would have grace for the task...and that there would be no angry parents shouting at their children. Sure enough, I passed a dad and his three young children in the frozen food section. They were talking and laughing, so sweet. The dad pulled his littlest boy close and hugged him tight and told him he was so glad to be his daddy. I nearly cried...but, instead I smiled. Our paths crossed several more times as we each made our way up and down the aisles. At one point, I overheard the little girl ask if they had enough money to buy Che*t-os. The dad did some quick calculations in his head, and excitedly answered "Yes, we do!" She grinned from ear to ear. As I was leaving, I passed them in the "arcade" area near the exit. They were laughing and enjoying the driving game together. I walked through the exit and then immediately knew that I was to go back and give them a few more dollars to play games with. I had a short conversation with God in my mind, "Are you serious? I don't even know them? I am really a shy person..." I knew God would win...so, I looked into my wallet and found a 20 dollar bill, and three 1 dollar bills. This was a miracle in itself - I rarely carry more than a few dollars in cash. So, I went back in...sheepishly approached them and told the dad that he had blessed me. I told him that I loved watching him really enjoy his children...his little girl grinned at me and said (in a thick southern accent), "My daddy is the best!" I handed him 3 dollars (thinking my hubby wouldn't be happy about me giving a stranger 20 dollars for games) and told him to enjoy a few more games on me. As I walked away, I heard him say, "Yippee, 12 more games!" I still can't believe that God asked me to do that - but, I am so thankful that I did. I told Brad about this...he said, "Why didn't you give him the twenty?" I love that man!
  
• My heart is breaking for those who have had a bad experience with the church...and been hurt deeply as a result. Not sure what to do about it just yet...but, I feel like God is working.
• I stink at being consistent in disciplining my children. ugh. Sometimes, I just get tired or lazy.
• I am really more rebellious than I would like to be. For example, when people ask if we are finished "growing" our family (always asked with a twisted face that implies we'd be foolish to have more children)...I secretly long to answer with something like, "actually, I am expecting" or "we are adopting." I know that our family is large by some standards, but it's all relative (pardon the pun {snort})...many families are much larger than ours. Usually, I smile and say how blessed we are...and that we're not certain what God has in mind for our family.
  
• I love being a mom of boys.
  
• I don't have anxiety about Sam beginning Kindergarten this fall. He is a momma's boy and I know he'll struggle initially. However, he is so ready to go - academically and socially. It's going to be a huge adjustment for all of us. I think I am really going to miss having him around in the afternoon.
• Matthew is sick with a virus of some sort and running a really high fever...I know it's twisted, but I have really enjoyed some extra snuggles with him today! The twins are on the move constantly these days, so snuggles are more difficult to come by.
  
• Caleb is obsessed with sitting on the couch. The only problem is that he has no idea how to get down...or that the fall could be painful. It is a source of anxiety.
• Matthew is a climber, for sure. He scaled the kitchen chair and onto the table in a matter of seconds while Brad was filling his sippy-cup with milk. Can't even imagine what this will look like in a few weeks. ugh. The joys of boys!
  
• Luke has worn through another pair of shoes in just 4 short weeks. He has this little "green man" riding toy that he loves dearly...he zooms up and down the driveway and he uses his feet to brake. I bought another pair of "durable looking" shoes. We'll see how long they last.
• My husband is an entrepreneur at heart. He always has something brewing in his mind. It's sometimes a source of stress for me...I value stability! (grin) However, God is teaching me to truly love my hottie boy for who he is...just as God intended him to be. So, Brad is teaching me through his ventures into gardening, composting, rain water collecting, fish guiding, etc... and I am learning to enjoy the ride. {grin}
• I love that God still uses music to stir my heart and make my eyes leak. It makes me wish I could sing well...or at least on key. I love that He loves my praise anyway! What a good God!